Tuesday, July 16, 2013

2030 Safewaste

Recently I was driving blithely along, expelling my share of planet-warming carbon remnants into the atmosphere, and I noticed a new sign at my friendly neighborhood mega-corporation fossil fuel dispensary that was about to shorten my few pleasurable moments left on this earth.
This the dispensary, which in an act of friendliness, recently not only raised prices generally, citing middle-eastern concerns having to do with some wholly predictable conflict, but also specifically raised prices if I chose to use my formerly same-as-cash debit card.
Like I say, friendly.
They had a new friendly offer. I could get a certain number of cents off any gallon of gas by using my Safeway club card rewards. How thoughtful. Now if I shopped for my groceries at one giant non-local mega-corporation chain I could save money buying fuel from another non-local mega-corporation chain. I suddenly felt way less gouged and violated.
Or was that more?
Because, of course, the Safeway trade-off means I can only use their club card to save myself from being gouged at their store if I turn over my privacy by having them register my personal buying history at the register. Now Safeway will know where and when I get my gas too.
Funny thing though. What kind of deal with the devil did Chevron make? They have a mini-mart right there. They're essentially saying shop at our grocery competitor and we'll make less money on the gas we sell you too.
I got gas there since. Probably for the last time. Because now I'm even more inconvenienced. Yep. When I swipe my debit card, I have to first press an extra button to start the transaction.
It tells them I don't have a Safeway rewards card.
Another second of my rapidly shortening life wasted.
Or should I say safewasted…
America, ya gotta love it.

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