Friday, April 03, 2015

2437 Phone Home

Recently I got a telephone call at home.  On my brand spanking new, bell and whistle encrusted, smartypants phone that can do so much.  I can even expand the size of the font on the text function.  (I guess since it's on a phone you should call it phont.)

I can also get good audio quality FM radio on it.  What I can't get is good quality phone coverage.

The call was something of an emergency, and as I struggled to communicate, I went outside to get better reception.  It was pouring rain.  So here I am with an expensive phone, soaked and freezing to death, standing in the rain out at the end of my driveway, trying to resolve a minor emergency. 

I wonder if there's an app for pneumonia. 

Here's the thing.  All my neighbors are in the same boat.  Many's the time we encounter each other out in our yards yelling into our phones.  It's like the new party line, but with echoes bouncing off the landscaping.

I thought, what we all need to add to that landscaping is a little kiosk or phone pergola.  My friend Kris recommended a different solution.  Bring back the phone booth.

Excellent idea.  Forget that our houses are already wired for an old-fashioned reliable phone thingy that plugs into the wall and gets excellent reception.  Let's all build a fake phone booth in our front yard.  Plant a rhody next to it.  Some perennials.  Trick it up.  A dry place we could get less bad reception and not stand out in the rain. 

Sure it's like were going back in time, but why not?  Just make it look like a Tardis. 

I wonder if my homeowners' association would allow it? 

I'll give 'em a call. 

America, ya gotta love it. 

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