Monday, August 26, 2013

2057 Two Wonders

Lately I've encountered a couple of things that made me wonder. Totally unrelated actually, except they had the misfortune to run across the crevices of my mind and fall in.

First, I was driving down the freeway. Ever notice have we go “up the road” and “down the freeway”? Anyhow, I saw a van coming up on my right. As it passed me, I noticed it appeared to have the logo of the triple-A Auto Insurance Company. You know, three capital A's arranged inside a sort of oval. 

"Emergency Batteries" it also said. Which led me to believe its function was more of less for roadside assistance. Perhaps to help those who had AAA insurance and whose batteries died when they were driving down the freeway or up the road. 

(BTW---I used to think AAA was insurance for people who were really really bad alcoholics.)

Unfortunately, the van's painters felt they needed to amplify the message about its function. Because in regular letters they'd written: "AAA batteries delivered and installed." 

Since the AAA wasn't enclosed in the logo oval, it looked like they'd be happy to change out the AAA batteries in your MP3 player.

My other observation also sort of had to do with roads, but in this case pavement generally. And the use seagulls make of it. I saw one dropping a clam on the pavement from a high height, breaking the shell open. The seagull then swooped down and slurped up the exposed gelatinous results. 

So my questions, what did seagulls do before man and pavement came along? Were they really accurate with rocks? Are we unwittingly countering the seagull population-reducing effects of six-pack rings? 

If their poop propellant accuracy on our cars is any indication, they apparently don't feel like it's enough.

America, ya gotta love it. 

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