Friday, August 15, 2014

2290 Mobile Corpse

It's been on so many TV shows and in so many movies I guess when it really seems to happen it must be kind of spooky. I'm talking about the zombie apocalypse.

Two news items caught my eye recently that put me in mind of the walking dead. Why is it, by the way, that we seem so obsessed with zombies? Must be a distorted distillation of our longing for an afterlife. If not heaven or hell then animated corpses or vampires. One way or the other folks don't want to accept mortality.

Philosophical pondering aside, here are the stories. A computer bug recently caused the Selective Service System to send more than 14,000 "draft registration" letters -- to men born in the 1800s. I suppose the computer figured they were sort of over 18. What's a couple of zeros to a computer. 18. 1800. Meh.

One 73-year-old guy, from Pennsylvania, was, as he put it, "dumbfounded" after he got a letter demanding that his late grandfather register for the draft or face imprisonment. 

"You betcha, you draft office whippersnappers. I'll just hop right out of the grave and shuffle down and register. Or maybe not. Prison sounds a lot nicer than a cramped moldy casket..."

The other walking dead story caused a different fall out. Literally and figuratively. A malfunctioning door caused a corpse to fall out of the back of a coroner's van onto a busy Pennsylvania road, making traffic come to a, dare I say it, dead stop. One driver thought it was a prank and couldn't decide whether to cry or laugh. Certainly a new take on deadpan humor.

I wonder. Since both incidents happened in Pennsylvania; do you think the corpse was actually hitching a ride to the draft board?

America, ya gotta love it. 

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