#339 Kampchair

Remember in the old days when we used to go to a picnic in the park and sit on a blanket? I hated that. I never could seem to get comfortable. Sitting on the ground, even cross-legged yoga style, eventually stresses me in the small of my back. Is there a large of the back? Or a big of the back? Something about suspending your keester up off the ground, even if it’s only a few inches, makes sitting so much more comfortable. But I think there’s a limit. At least occasionally, we need to rough it a little bit. I also remember sitting my butt down on hard and splintery bleacher seats. Or even those rows of benches like they have at revivals. Simple planks with rudimentary legs at either end. Hard and with no back support. Make you want to jump up and shout the lord’s name to get kinks out. I was kind of glad when they came out with those seat back canvas thingies that unfold to give you a little something to lean back on. Still, I was conflicted, I didn’t take them to every one of my kid’s sports events. I didn’t want to seem like a total stadium wimp. So the other day when I was at the park for a concert thing, I looked out at the crowd and saw a whole lot of the those canvas and metal tube unfoldable camp chairs. You know the ones I mean, they fit in a narrow bag and then unfold like some transformer toy into this incredible simulation of a chair. Arms and legs and seat and back and all made out of lightweight canvas so you can truck it the whole block from your car to the ball field and not get tuckered. I have a couple myself. They beat the hell out of splintery bleachers and they are a great substitute for the pain in the grass which is sitting on the ground. Still, I saw a couple in the crowd which made me sit up straight. These chairs were the same fold apart aluminum tube and canvas; they had the same cupholders indented into their arms. But the had an added feature. You could lean back and a little footrest part would stick out as the back locked at an Adirondack recline position. That’s right, they were recliner camp chairs. Leanbacks of the outback. Barcoloungers of the woods. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve hiked ten miles in a day, gathered wood, built a campfire, put on a pot of coffee with river water I pumped through a filter and thought to myself, this would be perfect if only I’d brought a barcolonger. They’ve got a winner. If they could work a rocking function and maybe a solar battery powered massager into the deal the campgrounds will be fuller than ever. Some suggestions: Install an umbrella to keep off the sun and some kind of fold out netting for the ‘skeeters. Better yet, saturate the whole thing with chemical bug repellent. Sew on a little warning sign to keep the teething babies and small dogs from chewing on it—those of them that can read anyhow.
America, ya gotta love it.