Monday, December 29, 2014

2378 SLOW Coffee

A while ago I commented about the interminable wait I experienced at a coffee shop dedicated to the craft of making the absolutely perfect cup of coffee. Let me say, kudos to them.

Unfortunately, the biggest problem with really good personal service is being second in line. 

I guess I was just being optimistic. Because a recent episode of Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee had Comedians Jerry Seinfeld and Fred Armisen encountering even worse. They went to Portland. 

Portland is, apparently, the epicenter of the handcrafted personal service movement. Or perhaps I should say the Service Lovingly and Organically Wrought movement. SLOW.

The Seinfeld show even had an animated graphic on the screen called a Hiptster Wait-o-meter. Their coffee took 7 minutes and 5 seconds to prepare. And they were first in line. A similar experience at a Portland food cart took 14 minutes and 23 seconds. 

Obviously, Portland is the city of the young. The anti-fast food movement is predicated on good philosophy to be sure, individuality, quality, attention to detail, but all of that requires something us old baby boomers have too little of -- time.

I like a good cup of coffee, but I also like to have time during my coffee break to enjoy it. 

Not that the furniture they put in coffee snob shops encourages actually sitting and enjoying the brew they so lovingly and organically wrought. To prevent other hipsters from plugging in their devices and batteries, and camping for the day, hipster cafes have had to resort to fast food restaurant tactics. No electrical outlets, tiny tables, and hard chairs.

Still, the experience is perfect for time-on-their-hands young folks, with their heads bowed anti-socially over their smartphones anyway, as they inch closer to the front of the line. 

America, ya gotta love it. 

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