Wednesday, April 14, 2010

#1226 Odd Ends

The way folks say things sometimes has unintended consequences when it comes to understanding. Our words can be tricky. Take the following three examples.
I heard someone the other day say something that made me think he was some kind of racist. I had to speculate that he didn’t like people from the land of Lacta perhaps. He said he was Lactose intolerant.
I was appalled and said, “No whey!”
“Yeah,” he said, “no curds either.”
He didn’t tell me how he felt about Iranians.
Speaking of cheesy, I was driving by this motel and it had a big banner on the front advertising to everyone what fine amenities it had. But it used the word “full” a lot.
One of the things they hyped on the banner was that they had a “full hot breakfast.” There was a picture of a steaming stack of flapjacks slathered with syrup and butter.
The other part of the sign said they had a full sized exercise room. It had a picture of a stationary bike. With a very large seat on it.
So do they mean their exercise room is a large room when they say full sized or do they mean it’s for full sized people? Possible those same people who enjoyed a full sized breakfast.
Pack it in, and sweat it off, we put the amen in your full amenity motel.
Speaking of food. This other guy was telling me how he’s not into that whole salt and olive oil thing in his boiling water when he cooks pasta. He also doesn’t care to go to the trouble of stirring it. He’s almost religiously unconcerned about his spaghetti being clumpy and in tangles.
Yep, he’s a pasta-farian.
America, ya gotta love it.

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