#878 Chimpskate

For many years I’ve tried to confront my inner cheapskate. Funny thing. It turns out he’s a chimpanzee.
A chimpskate.
Actually, the truth goes even further back evolutionarily.
He’s a monkey. And he’s hardwired in my genes.
I once told the story about how I went into a place to use a free gift certificate and they didn’t give me 20% off like they gave everyone else. I was getting the item free anyhow and yet I was upset I wasn’t getting it for 20 percent off of free.
I felt cheated enough never to go back to the place. I felt they should have treated my gift certificate just like cash. Since, after all, it was purchased with cash.
So recently I was reading this article on how monkeys trade. Trade is seen as a sophisticated human thing, but monkeys do it all the time.
The experiment was this: a monkey was offered three jello cubes by a researcher and then at the last second was only given two. The same monkey was offered one cube of jello by another researcher and at the last second was given an additional one. From that point forward, the monkey went to the researcher who offered the “bonus” cubes and not the one who “cheated” him out of a cube.
Even though in both cases the monkey ended up with two cubes of jello.
You and I would probably do the same thing. The one appears to be dishonest, offering us one thing and then taking it back. But the other appears to be generous, giving us something extra.
And we love something extra.
But here’s the really interesting thing. The pattern persisted with the monkeys even when their bonus guy only gave a bonus ever tenth transaction or so. Or any random number of transactions.
This while the cheating cuber consistently offered three then gave two. Just the mere chance of getting something for nothing was enough to keep the monkeys coming.
That’s why that gambling addiction is a monkey on your back.
You can’t keep your money in your pocket because there’s a casino in your genes.
America, ya gotta love it.