#694 Unforeseen Camo

I went into this giant outdoor store and they had everything you could ever imagine relating to outdoor stuff. They kind of specialize in hunting and fishing so I expected guns, bows, and fishing rods.
I even thought I might see a creel.
What I didn’t expect was a whole section devoted to cooking. From ordinary utensils, to smokers, to giant deep fat turkey fryers, they had it all. Jerky makers too.
These people take their hunting seriously. Which is good. If you’re gonna kill it, you oughta eat it.
And if you’re gonna mount Bullwinkle on your wall, then you at least ought to have some moose jerky.
So I was amazed at the camo section these folks had. But some of the camo products were perhaps a little odd. The products may be meant to be unseen, but the results of using them were unforeseen.
For one, they had camo wallets. Now I know from personal experience this is not a good idea. I once made the mistake of buying a camo wallet and taking it on a hike. It was one of those nylon tri-fold jobbies and I promptly lost it from my pocket one night in camp when I was shucking my drawers.
The next morning I looked all over hell and gone for it. Finally found it when I stepped on it. Guess what? Blended right into the scenery. Just like it was supposed too.
The stupid thing is, my wallet’s always in my pocket so it doesn’t need to be camo. I’m not going to take a regular colored wallet out and spook game because it’s highly unlikely I’ll be paying for anything in the woods.
Same with this other thing I saw at the store. A camo cellphone. A lot more expensive thing to drop and lose in the woods. And again really, if you’re hunting game is it a good idea to be jabbering away on your cellphone?
You think that deer might have a clue you’re human at that point? Because you’re, you know, talking...
America, ya gotta love it.