Wednesday, February 27, 2013

1932 Broken Pieces

The world is such a jumble of change. The other day I woke up suddenly, my heart beating like a hummingbird on crank, and cried out. "Oh no, they took the wrestler piece out of Monopoly!"
As I collapsed back on my pillow, the various strands of reality untangled themselves and I sighed relief. It's the iron that they got rid of in Monopoly. And wrestling that they removed from the Olympics.
Both of them too bad if you ask me. Wrestling is like the oldest Olympic sport. It goes all the way back to the ancient Greek games. And funny thing, those funky wrestling singlets they wear now would have actually been the picture of modesty back then. In ancient Greece they did all their Olympic sports naked.
They didn't have that skiing and rifle shooting biathlon back then. Much less hot weather long distance cycling. Thank goodness. Sprocket pinch injuries can be excruciating.
So bye-bye to Greco-Roman wrestling. The IOOC is a little odd. I mean, they've actually kept synchronized swimming.
The Monopoly game is worse. They did an online poll to determine which piece to lose and which piece to add. So they dumped the iron and added a cat. Apparently, the online feline lobby was looking for equity with the canines, as a little Scottie dog has been a Monopoly favorite for years.
But I see it as another symbol of our laziness. It's not a little ironic that the iron, an iconic representation of hard work and toil, should be replaced by a pussy cat.
I'm only surprised they didn't offer a tiny toy replica of a TV remote as an option.
Nothing like watching the Olympics from the comfort of your couch while your kitty cat monopolizes your lap.
America, ya gotta love it.

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