1893 Toy Annoy

Around the holidays it's always interesting to see the gifts that experts recommend for kids. I'm not sure what they're experts in, but they certainly have odd recommendations.
Like this one who suggested the new Razor Pocket Mod Electric Scooter. Razor, as you may remember, are the folks who designed the skateboard with a handle you see kids bopping around the neighborhood with. Or as I like to call them, an involuntary tracheotomy on wheels. Yeah, I know, catchy.
Apparently, not content to cause bodily harm naturally, Razor has upped their game and invented a battery-powered child maiming device. The Razor Mod Scooter, as the reviewer says, "brings a vintage Italian flair to the cul-de-sac."
Great for pre-Vespians who actually live on a cul-de-sac. Those children who live on a through street can rely on the scooter's 15mph speed to save them from being crushed by a neighborhood giant SUV.
Yes, it goes at a limb-breaking road-rashing 15 mph.
And yes, I did say pre-Vespian. The Razor Scooter looks not unlike a Vespa, so your kiddies can develop sassy Italian courage early, as they learn to be ignored by other cars and trucks blindly running them over, thanks to American driver's total obliviousness of motorcycles sharing the road.
Another oddly recommended gift is the Techno Source Glow Crazy Doodle Dome. It's a black tent kids can sit inside in the dark while using a light wand to draw on the walls. When the art fades they can draw on it again.
Really, we want to teach our kids to do art on the walls? Doesn't that sound suspiciously like graffiti?
First we make them bikers of the cul-de-sac. Now writers on the walls in their own personal subway station.
Who says toys can't be educational?
America, ya gotta love it.