1798 Candidated Spam

It's election season and that means one thing---tree-killing junk mail.
Yep, mailbox spam, the bane of every resident and the boon of the US Postal Service. This is the one time of year they can actually turn a profit.
Because, at least in my mailbox, not a day goes by without three new flyers telling me whom I should vote for. Most of the rest of the year I get ads for pizza and Lovers Packages so in a way it's a relief. Looking at pictures of perfect smiling families is a nice change from lurid photographs depicting semi-naked hussies hawking hootchie-cootchie underwear.
But family photos get boring pretty quickly too. Why is it that every candidate feels it's so necessary to send me a rack card-quality circular with a picture of the dear old family? The obligatory two children, dressed in all-American sweaters and khakis you know they never wear except when Aunt Maebelle comes to call, and scrubbed so hard their ears are still red late into the photo session, when the Northwest weather finally cooperated enough to render that perfect shot.
Then there's the pets. Apparently all successful candidates must have pets. Pets show trans-species compassion, very important when you're promoting non-trans-partisan gridlock.
As I contribute to candidates on both sides of the aisle, I get double the junkmail too. Curiously, Republicans this year are outspending Democrats 2-to-1 on building my instant recycle heap.
I'm not sure what that means. R's favor print because it's an Grand Old-fashioned Presentation? They think their targets are more literate? Or they think their voters like pretty retouched pictures of idealized America?
Come to think of it, the background in just about every picture does include amber waves of grain...
Or is that just weeds in a recent clearcut?
America, ya gotta love it.