1330 Receipt of Poison

It’s as if there’s a Global Conspiracy working to eliminate all forms of paper from our lives. What paper trail are they afraid of?
Did you every notice the back part of the word conspiracy is piracy? Prepare to be pillaged. For years banks and companies have been urging us to do everything online—no paper, no receipt. You have to ask them for a copy of your checks. You have to pay them for a copy of your checks.
Then they made it easy for us not to write checks at all. Electronic fund transfers and online bill-paying made those old-fashioned paper checks unnecessary. But they’ll still charge you for a hard copy of a transaction.
Now there are companies who back up your computer and store its files at separate sites—all electronically. Who needs a shredding truck? All your data is secure in some nebulous place in someone else’s hands.
All that’s left to us are the little receipts we get at grocery stores, ATMs, and gas stations. And now they’re trying to scare us away from those.
Because guess what? “Scientists” have concluded that a huge source of the chemical BPA is paper receipts. Bisphenol-A, the icky chemical implicated in hormone disruption, heart ailments, cancer, paranoia, and behavioral problems, is found in greater concentration on cash register and ATM receipts than in plastic-coated cans, or those old discontinued water bottles. 1000 times greater. Three separate studies found the BPA coating transfers easily to fingers and may even penetrate the skin.
So when your checker person asks if you want a receipt after you pay with your debit card, just say no. Who needs a poison paper trail confusing things with a permanent record?
Thanks for shopping at the Global Conspiracy.
Yarr...
America, ya gotta love it.