#257 Throwback Mountain

So I talk a lot about reading. Yes, I’m a throwback. I’m one of those people who still remembers the ancient art of reading. I just can’t get quit of it. I suppose I’m a throwback in other ways too, I don’t have a cellphone, I signal before I make a turn, and I say please and thank you. But there’s hope I will eventually get in tune with the 21st century. I did throw away my slide rule.
You could say I’m a compulsive reader. It’s how my mind occupies itself. When I was a little kid I used to drive my parents crazy when we’d go out in the car. At least until I could read. Then I found the wonderful world of billboards. Up until Ladybird’s highway beautification project, I was calm and content between reststops.
So I read billboards and store signs even today and since my mind has twisted since those halcyon days of youth, I see things oddly. Strange juxtapositions of signs and stuff. Like I notice that the poshest banks buy billboard advertising and most billboards are in really rundown sections of town. I notice that every bus and his buddy appear to have a bank billboard on them. Must be the new trend. Seems like if a big institution sees one of their competitors doing something they get a jones to do the same thing. Regardless of how ineffective. The new bandwagon is busses. Banks on busses. So which one of them stands out? If everybody’s doing it, it all fades into mediocrity.
Such is mass marketing. So anyhow, I’m driving down the road, I see this sign, and it says “Xin’s Exotic Nursery.” But it apparently shares a building with another business because right underneath the “Xin’s” is a sign that says “After Hours Adult Entertainment.” I read quickly so I get: “Xin’s Exotic Nursery After Hours Adult Entertainment.” That is exotic. Do they strip bark off the trees? Do Nude Topiaries? If you’re rowdy do they ask you to leave?
Then I saw this other place. It was a yoga place. Now I’m pretty sure yoga is grounded in Buddhism. That it’s a physical extension of meditation and the search for peace and enlightenment—a cure for the stresses of our driven western culture. Anyhow, the sign said: “Something or another yoga center, 10 years, Olympia’s first and oldest yoga center. Hmmm, sounds a little like an advertisement. And a little, um, entrepreneurial. One might even say competitive. What a concept, competitive Buddhism. Look out Christians, another lion has entered the arena.
And lastly, I was watching TV with the sound off and I saw an ad. It was for Cialis. It occurred to me for the first time what it is that’s always nagged me about that name. Cialis—It sounds like a citrus drink. Or a smoothie.
America, ya gotta love it.