Thursday, July 07, 2011

1530 Porta Parable

In the course of my profession, I often have the opportunity to go to various outdoor festivals. And I've learned that one of the secrets to a successful festival is the plethora of porta-potties available. Nothing more likely to get a crowd roiled than a buildup of noxious bodily humors.
No humor there at all.
But porta-potties are more than just waste receptacles, they are microcosms of humanity. I saw a couple of things recently that sat oddly with me.
Porta-potty designers have done their best to streamline the interiors to prevent filth buildup. The fewer corners, the fewer nooks and crannies to clean. But up in the corner of this one I went in, wedged between the vent pipe and the wall, were two empty bags of chips.
And it made me think we are way too addicted to our snack foods. The idea of someone sitting in a porta-potty, munching on Doritos, was somehow extremely off-putting.
For one thing, the little sanitizer dispenser they have in porta-potties are no match at all for Dorito fingers. And secondly, one really needs to keep one's bodily functions appropriately separated. Just because you're at a fair, doesn't mean you need to forsake all civilized behavior.
The other thing I saw was a cautionary tale on single parenthood. A porta-parable if you will. Some poor woman had four kids, all under the age of six, and she needed to use the facility. She also didn't have another parent to share her load. So she had to unpack her stroller and herd all the kids into one of the larger handicapped labeled porta-potties. It was like some bizarre version of a college phone booth prank.
But fairs do come with a fair share of unsavory characters. So the porta-potty offered porta-protection too.
America, ya gotta love it.

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