#750 Infant M&M’s

So not long ago I was walking though the supermarket and I ran across a display of Easter candy on sale. Among the Robin Eggs and Peeps were some bags of pastel-colored M&M’s. I snapped them up.
Half off? You bet.
I could care less Easter is passed. The great thing about M&M’s making seasonal varieties is that you find them on sale. And the greater thing is, whether they’re traditional, Halloween orange, or Easter pastel, they taste exactly alike.
Why do they still call them M&M’s though? They’re all the same. Just call them M’s…
There were a couple of disturbing things on the packaging. The whole thing was called a “Bunny Mix.” I’m always a little wary about bunnies and small pellet shaped items.
I raised bunnies in science class and, well, let’s just say pellets accrue.
The package also featured a picture of the M&M cartoon character known as Red, which is a large red M&M with arms, three-fingered hands, bare legs, and shoes. He also has eyes, eyebrows, and a mouth. The rest of him is an M&M—no hips, shoulders, butt, pants, shirt, or whatever. Just a round swollen disc.
In this rendition, he is holding what appears to be a gardening spade and wearing green, three-fingered gardening gloves. The side of his mouth is cracked open as if he is a New York wiseguy, and the words next to it say, “Springtime brings out my sensitive side.” Disturbingly, behind him are featureless pastel-colored M&M’s planted in flowerpots.
So two things: Is gardening only for sensitive folks? I mean, growing a field of ethanol-destined corn is gardening in a sense. Harvesting hops headed for the brewery is gardening.
So why is the macho M&M insinuating gardening is less than fully masculine?
Second. Why is an M&M only human when it has shoes, and plant-like when it’s in a pot?
Cause really, since the M&Ms in the flowerpot are smaller, it looks like Big Red is burying M&M babies.
A distinctly insensitive thing to do.
America, ya gotta love it.