1908 New Techo-Faces

I was reading online about the recent Consumer Electronics Show and all the new gadgets and gizmos coming down the pike. I was pretty amazed. And, frankly, a little scared about the faces of new technology. Literally.
One innovation is available in the new Galaxy Note 2. It's a thing for your photos called Best Face. Great name. Everyone wants to put their best face forward, right? This one goes you one better. It puts your best face in a group photo forward.
Know how every time you take a group photo there's at least one person who chooses that moment to blink, squint, or hang their mouth open in a weird way? Best Face automatically eliminates that. It takes multiple pictures across a tiny spectrum of time, then picks the best headshot in each one and melds them together as a group, as if it were all taken at once.
Dude. Drive-by photoshopping. We can now pre-record a version of reality that didn't exist in real time. And have instantaneous pictorial proof. The philosophical implications are enormous. Who says the apocalypse hasn't already come?
Another thing at the electronics show was TVs that will change channels and volume at a distance. You won't have to use a remote control, just make gestures towards your TV, which will watch you and respond.
I'm just thinking…no more making whoopee on the couch. Imagine the surprise when your best move changes you to the Televangelist network. Best face indeed.
Lastly, as I was looking at snippets from the CES event online, I got to see the new fancy-schmancy TVs they're offering, and all their supposedly luminous high-definition video quality. Face it. I was not impressed.
Not one of them had a picture any better than my computer monitor.
America, ya gotta love it.