1448 Sexth Senseless

If it ever seems like there’s been a lot of sex scandals in the last 20 years involving politicians, you’re darn right. Hard to keep track isn’t it? Seems way back there was this guy named Gary Hart, and Clinton, of course, and Spitzer.
Then recently there was shirtless, and clueless, Chris Lee. And that Midwest anti-gay guy with the boyfriend at the airport. And the other professed aggressive anti-gay guy with the coincidentally aggressive bathroom stance.
After awhile they all seem to merge together into an orgy of inappropriateness. Politician and philanderer like two sides of the same coin. As if that was the one question they all missed in the vocabulary tests: “What good action helps charity? Philanthropy or philandering?”
Well, you’ll be happy to know someone has actually been keeping track. And that they have a statistical turn of mind. Answering that eternal question: “What do baseball stat keepers do in the off season?”
The results are in. Turns out that in the last 20 years there have been a total of 61 sex scandals. At this point Republicans lead the peccadillian pack. 34 since 1990. Democrats have 27, so they’re pulling their share.
Of the scandal categories in resignation Jeopardy, The R’s have had more incidents involving prostitutes and/or underage boys, and featured more politicians standing up for “family values”.
Democrats had scandals more likely to involve female staffing, sexual harassment, and underage girls. No statistic on cigar use.
It’s frightening to note the underage category, of either gender, cuts across the aisle. Not the sort of bi-partisanship you expect when you send your 17-year-old off to be a page.
But then what would you expect? How does the saying go— absolute power corrupts absolutely?
I think we need some corruptess interruptus.
America, ya gotta love it.