#1166 Mass Cots

One of the interesting things about small schools getting bigger is that we’re seeing new team mascots in the national mass spotlight.
And some of the animals they choose for mascots are weird. I suppose there can only be so many bears, bulldogs, and tigers. But still, you look for a mascot to have some attribute of vigor or tenacity that makes them an inspiring example.
I’ve always questioned certain mascots. The Oregon teams, the Ducks and the Beavers, are a little too aquatic for my taste. Plus, yelling out “go beavers” evokes an image I’m not sure I’m comfortable with—a herd of big-toothed rodents leveling a forest.
The Evergreen College Geoducks are even worse. No one should ever pick anything from the snail and slug family as a mascot.
Aberdeen has a Community College whose mascot is the Chokers. Loggers think that’s fine. The general public can see why they never seem to win a close game.
Lately it seems things have been getting worse. The recent Fiesta Bowl offered us an even weirder mascot. The TCU Horned Frogs. At first I thought the announcer said Texas Christian University Horn Dogs.
Definitely time for a hearing aid.
But Horned Frogs? Is it good to have a mascot that’s a cold-blooded amphibian? Even if they are large enough to eat a rat? I Wikipediad “Horned Frogs” and found out one of their most unusual traits is a row of teeth that prevents them from letting go of whatever they chomp.
So they can actually choke to death trying to eat something. They can truly bite off more than they can chew. Which is what they apparently did with the Broncos in the Fiesta Bowl.
Now there’s a mascot. The Broncos. That’s inspiring. No wonder they stomped the frogs.
But it’s the University of Minnesota that doesn’t seem to get the whole picture. Their mascot is a pest: the gopher.
Go go gophers.
I guess it’s no surprise they’re the only school with the graduate degree of “Office Intern.”
America, ya gotta love it.