#684 Unfeeling Cold

It’s not hard in the 21st Century to be overwhelmed by all the changes in technology. It seems like every other nanosecond someone comes out with something new and earth shattering in the way of inventiveness.
Kind of makes you wonder why we’re still dependent on foreign oil doesn’t it?
I mean, with computing speeds now seventy jillon times faster than the original green-screeners we started with, and with chips smaller than a slug’s eyestalk, you’d just figure someone would have come up with a fuel alternative by now that doesn’t drive up the price of corn in the supermarket.
Maybe the incentive of 100 bucks a barrel while light a stick under someone’s posterior.
In any event, the pursuit of such technology often takes interesting turns. The other day I was watching a football playoff/wrestling match and saw something interesting.
Oh, wait a minute, did I say wrestling match? Wrestling matches are fixed.
What was I thinking?
Still, you have to ask yourself why they call the things they do when the football gets hiked “plays.”
Anyhow, on comes this commercial for a beer company. No surprise there. Except they seem to have run out of things to say about crisp, clear, taste and so they’ve put the technological drafting horse to work and invented a fancy new bottle to create interest in their product.
It’s cold activated.
That’s right, when the mountains on the label turn blue, you know your beer is cold.
They should call it a beer-ometer!
So what if it’s like one of those semi-pornographic novelty cups you can buy that make the picture of someone’s outerwear disappear when you pour liquid in it?
Are you now curious about the craftsmanship behind the cold clear taste?
I mean, if they have to divert you with a gimmicky bottle...
And really. My refrigerator door doesn’t have a window in it like my oven, so I’ll have to be open it up to see if my beer is cold anyhow. And having opened the refrigerator I’ll be able to use that tried and true ancient technology to check for coldness.
My fingers.
America, ya gotta love it.