#559 Predictions

A few years ago, I predicted in this column that the next biggest business to invest in would be tattoo removal.
Since you get a tattoo by pricking your skin, should I have said: I predict they’ll want to be de-pricked?
Because a recent magazine article reports that surveys show 17% of people with tattoos now say they regret they are stuck with their decision to inject permanent ink into their skin.
Oops.
The removal industry is pumping, with names like Dr. Tattoff, Tat2BeGone and Tattoo MD.
I didn’t predict this though: Some tattoo places are now pricking in the original tattoos with a removal-friendly ink. It’s designed to disappear after just one laser treatment instead of the eight it usually takes which costs thousands of dollars.
They also have an interesting name for the phenomenon. As one removal guy put it, “...as your life changes from young to middle-aged to older, from single to married to divorced, you get tattoo regret.”
I like it. Sounds like a disease. Are you suffering from T.R.? Tattoo Regret? Call “See the Light” laser removal today.
Speaking of diseases and something I didn’t predict.
Just when you thought you’d heard the worst about herpes and its growing prevalence in the human population, it’s jumped species.
That’s right, that pesky little virus responsible for chicken pox, shingles, and genital blisters has also killed an elephant. A recent elephant death in a zoo was attributed to a strain of the herpes family.
Wow. Somehow the notion of someone carrying around a disease that can drop an elephant is amazing.
Even more amazing, that same virus is the cause of massive coral die-offs. They took samples of dying coral on reefs and it was loaded with human herpes viruses. Seems swimmers touching coral spread the virus and it goes wild.
Kind of like swine flu and monkey ebola does with us.
The fact that reefs are normally in tropical vacationland, herpes is stress-activated, and those places are usually honeymoon locations, seals the deal.
Hello herpes, goodbye coral. Wish you were here.
Hmm. I wonder if you had a tattoo that was a picture of a coral…
America ya gotta love it