Thursday, July 19, 2007

#561 Pillaging Bears

Not too long ago I was reading an article in National Geographic. Animals are really neat.
It was a big article on Grizzly bears. I love it when bears grizzle.
They are dangerous animals to be sure. Last year in Yellowstone they killed one person and injured six more. They did the same the year before that.
One of the rangers put it in perspective though. He said it was "...only half as bad as the other large mammal in the park. The horse."

But back to bears. These beasts are smart beasts indeed. A scientist once stunned one to tag and equip it with a radio thingy. While the bear was sedated, they examined it's mouth. Turned out he had an abscessed tooth.
Also turned out the bear had stuffed that area of his mouth with willow bark. Willow bark is a great natural source for salicylic acid, otherwise known as aspirin.
Woh.
Which brings to mind a couple of questions. If bears are that smart, how do they handle the radio tagging issue socially? "Hey Smokey, nice ear tag, into piercing? What's next? A tattoo?"
"What's with the neck radio Teddy, cellphone acting up?"
"Hey Mamma Bear. If you weren't spending all your time dumpster diving, your cub wouldn't have more needle pricks than a lab rat."
Which is another question. If a bear is smart enough to seek out and remember willow bark as an analgesic, wouldn't certain bears actually go out of their way to "accidentally" get tranquilized.
Kind of just hang out in scientific survey areas hoping for a little downer dart to mainline them in the rump?
Junkie bears, sallow faced and hollow eyed, ambling into the sights of some earnest intern doing an ursine population count, and who now is an unwitting pawn in the desperate game of Jellystone Park drug trafficking.
"See you later Boo Boo. Old Yogi's gonna make tracks down to the survey area for a little shot in the bear-ierre."
Smarter than your average bear....?

America ya gotta love it

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