1585 Redux Sleeper

In Sleeper, the classic 1973 movie by Woody Allen, the main character, a health food store owner, wakes up in the future and discovers everything he thought he knew about nutrition was wrong. Future science discovered the food that was best for you was junk food.
The recent news makes me feel like that kind of déjà vu all over again.
British scientists analyzed studies involving more than 100,000 people and concluded that those who reported eating the most chocolate—no matter whether it was in cookies, milk shakes or candy bars—were 37% less likely to develop cardio-vascular disease and 29% less likely to have a stroke than those who ate the least.
Another study done about the same time found that eating cheese can affect depression and anxiety. A bacteria called lactobacillus rhamnosus was proven to have a calming effect on mice when they ate foods laden with it. The finding bolsters other recent research that says our gut "microbiome"—the name for the hundreds of species of bacteria living in our digestive system—has a major effect on our moods and health.
I'm happier already. Cheese and chocolate are healthy alternatives? What about fresh fruit?
Enter listeria. Listeria is a bacteria that causes listeriosis and has been found responsible for numerous deaths and sickness. In the most recent case, an outbreak was traced to cantaloupe grown in Colorado. Other severe illness has been caused lately by salmonella linked to organic bean sprouts.
Cantaloupe, bean sprouts, sickness.
So there you have it. Fresh fruit and vegetables bad. Cheese and chocolate good. Gee, if McDonalds serves chocolate cake, they can rebrand themselves as a health food store.
And Woody Allen may wake up to see the future he predicted.
I wonder if he'll appreciate the irony.
America, ya gotta love it.