#1018 Pate’ Cake

I had an uncle who was the bane of this one restaurant. Every day when it first opened its all-you-can-eat salad bar my uncle would come in, load up on all kinds of stuff, and on a separate plate put this giant dollop of the goose pate’.
And I mean giant. It would fill one of those Styrofoam cubes like they once served Big Macs in. My uncle would then ask for such a to-go container and the waitress would reluctantly get it for him. He would then take the goose mousse home and serve it to his dog.
What always got me was I felt my uncle wasn’t playing by the all-you-can-eat rules. Take all you want but eat all you take.
As it wasn’t an all-you-can-eat Buffet but a regular restaurant with a salad bar my uncle felt the rule didn’t apply. It bugged me for years until I realized pate’ has a very short shelf life, and the proprietor of the restaurant, knowing my uncle’s early-bird eating habits, most likely put yesterday’s pate’ out on purpose, hoping my uncle would take all of it.
He still got my uncle’s money for the rest of his dinner and his pate’ disposal problem was solved. My uncle’s dog apparently thought extra-aged goose liver was dog food.
Like this story I read the other day. Researchers recently fed goose liver pate’, duck liver mousse, liverwurst, and Alpo dog food to 18 test subjects. Only three of the 18 were able to correctly distinguish the dog food from the other mashed up offerings.
I knew it. I always said pate’ tasted like dogfood. It’s not because 15 of 18 people have no taste, it’s because 15 of 18 can taste the obvious.
Just because we give pate’ a fancy schmancy name like foie gras, it’s still stinky fattened goose liver. And the liver is a bodily organ whose sole purpose is to filter and store poisons.
Dog Food is made up of the parts of animals nobody else wants. Unless you whip them into a French mousse.
Pate’ must be the food they served that emperor with the new clothes.
America, ya gotta love it.