#974 Dancing with the Hairs

Sometimes you wonder, what were they thinking? I heard the other day that ditched contestant, Melissa Rycroft, from the show “The Batchelor”, is going over to “Dancing with the Stars” for the remainder of the season. Apparently, she’s replacing Access Hollywood host Nancy O’Dell, who dropped out because of a knee injury.
So what’s the deal here? Do they have a limited pool of “real” people to use on reality TV? Is Melissa, who started as a real person, now enough of a celebrity as a result of her Batchelor fame to qualify as a celebrity replacement—as a star—now dancing with real people on the dance show? I’m confused.
Oh well. I guess she’s signed all the releases already so they saved on lawyers. Times are tough. Even cheap reality TV needs a way to get cheaper.
The other day I was looking through a list of businesses and I stumbled across one that got me into my “what were they thinking?” mode again. Apparently, it’s a styling salon. They’re known for their cutesy hair-oriented names.
This one is called “Little Shop of Hairs.”
Eeyoo.
I know they’re probably trying to come up with a clever sound-alike to “Little Shop of Horrors” but really. Do we want to conjure up the image of a horror movie when we talk about our styling salon?
This was a movie where a giant plant ate people. When I go to this shop, should I steer clear of the dieffenbachia in the waiting area? Maybe cringe away from the monkey plant hanging over the used magazine table?
And the name itself. Hairs. There is a huge qualitative difference between the word “hair” and the word “hairs.”
Hair is luxurious. Hairs are icky.
Hair is on your head. Hairs are in the sink.
Hair is a shiny mane. Hairs are things that sprout individually in unwanted places.
Hairs are ingrown. Hairs are candidates for electrolysis. Errant hairs are the legacy of a bad haircut. They slip under your collar and itch down your back and mingle with your back hairs.
Hairs give you the horrors.
What were they thinking?
America, ya gotta love it.