#965 Clicking Camels

In my son’s callow youth, he made the mistake of getting on the Camel Cigarette manufacturer’s mailing list. It was back when they were marketing to children with their cartoony Joe Camel character.
Nothing like a cigarette smoking “action figure” for bringing in the young trade.
Since my son moved out years ago, I am the one who periodically gets rather exotic mail from the makers of Camel Cigarettes. Let me tell you, these guys dump a ton of money into their direct mail ads. Folded and die cut with complicated edges, they have the finest stock, the glossiest finish, the deepest and most saturated inks.
All in all a first class operation for promoting slow and agonizing death.
It’s pretty obvious Camel hasn’t stopped targeting young smokers. It’s the classic advertising dilemma, when your product kills off your costumers, what do you do? Answer: Find new customers that aren’t dead yet.
Since they can’t use cartoon camels, they have to use the next best trick in young marketing, adding a techno-gimmick. In this case personalized mentholation. With a sound effect.
Yep. A little cartoon graphic on the fancy circular describes it. First, you pinch the filter, then you hear a “click,” then you get a burst of cool refreshing menthol. If you can’t control your smoking habit, you can at least take control of your actual cigarette—and instantly change the flavor!
Plus, you can hear a click just like your new Blackberry keyboard. It’s like texting yourself pure smoking satisfaction.
This idea will have the twitterers tweeting good news from here to the emphysema ward.
This mailer also gives a $1.50 coupon to help you try the new Camel Crush, in it’s stylish, black as death box. Is that “crush” as in love affair or “crush” as in when you’ve smoked so much your lungs feel like someone is sitting on your chest?
There’s also coupons for $3.40 off 2 packs or $5.00 off 3 packs. So you can save even more by really engraining your habit.
Sorry kids, the first one’s not free, but it’s as deeply discounted as the law will allow...
Are those noises clicks, or someone shaking coffin nails?
America, ya gotta love it.