#763 Odd Heinie

So the other day I was reading a book. There was a grizzled old character in it and he was talking about going off to war in the big one and fighting the heinies. It had been so long since I heard it, I’d forgotten that heinie was also an ethnic slur of Germans.
Ethnic slur, there’s a phrase for you. Made up of the negative word slur. Meaning slight, smear, or insult. But also something you do to your speech when you’re drunk or hit by a stroke or something.
It’s conceivable, say; that some old guy with one too many beers in him could actually insult some people while mushing his words drunkenly. Then he would slur a slur.
And what if the beer that fellow was drinking was actually Heineken? It’s makers actually encourage people in their advertising to use the nickname heinie to describe it.
Would that grizzled old fellow be confused if you sat at his table and asked the bartender to bring over some heinies?
And maybe that old coot would get drunker and drunker while he was imbibing his heinies and proceed to regale you with stories of the beer gardens in Bavaria after the war, where he caught the eye of some madchen who was looking for a quick ticket to the U.S. of A. And how after he brought her and her German bun in the oven back stateside they settled down to a life of bi-cultural arguments that the neighbors would often refer to as World War Three.
So it would be barely possible that he was the first one to equate the term heinie with a portion of the German female anatomy that was anything but tiny.
Which would eventually lead to the odd and yet somehow poetic scenario of this old complainer sitting in a bar slurring out a slur after he’d had one too many heinies, calling a German tourist a heinie, and having that angry fellow knock him on his heinie.
America, ya gotta love it.