#117 PSA Holes

They never seem to have public broadcasting campaigns for the stuff that really affects me. They’ve got a public service ad out now that talks about “Drive Hammered, Get Nailed,” and another one that says “Don’t get a ticket, leave more space,” but there isn’t one for cellphone pedestrians—if you ask me, our newest and most problematic road hazard. Using a cell phone is a good thing. Using one when you’re a pedestrian and having that use affect your judgment as to when it’s safe to cross the street, is not. When I write about nearly creaming some idiot cause she walked right in front of me while she was chatting on the phone, understand it’s not you and your phone usage I’m talking about, just the moron I nearly ran over. Problem is, it’s assumed that the driver is at fault in a pedestrian accident. So even though cell-phoid Annie is chatting up a blue streak and crossing against the light, the red streak she leaves under your bumper is your fault. We need a radio ad campaign for that. Something on the order of: “Dumb as a cow? Get creamed.”
The current campaign on the air about “Drive Hammered, Get Nailed” I find a little unsettling. It features a heartfelt testimonial by a lady who lost her daughter to a drunk driver. I really feel for the woman. Drunk driver homicides should be treated like any other homicide, and prosecuted accordingly. None of this involuntary manslaughter stuff. Nobody held a gun to the drunk’s head and forced him to get blotto. Nothing involuntary about it. But then the commercial in question brackets the heartfelt plea with this “Drive Hammered, Get Nailed” song. Surrounding a wrenching testimonial with what is essentially a bad pun is too jarring for me. Puns have their place, this isn’t one of them.
But it’s better than the other PSA out there now about preventing little snaky automobile drivers from causing accidents with poor helpless friendly old big trucks. The song talks about little guys cutting the big guys off. Leave ‘em plenty of room and all that. I agree. Big rigs can’t stop on a dime. Still, it seems to me more than once I have been the cuttee and/or the near-crushee as a methed-up longhauler has nearly crashed my ass to the guardrail. So though I appreciate the friendly reminder Traffic Safety Commission, let’s also target an ad campaign to the pot that’s calling the kettle black. And let’s come up with a more memorable slogan while we’re at it. The current catch phrase for this don’t cut off campaign is “Don’t get a ticket, Leave more space.” Not nearly as catchy as the seatbelt enforcement campaign, Click it or Ticket. Or the equally effective private oil change campaign, Lube it or Lose it. A campaign embraced by sophomoric folks from here to Sigmund Freud High School. “Don’t get a ticket, Leave more space” just doesn’t quite resonate. Was the creative department on vacation? Are the state’s coffers so empty we can’t afford a good ad agency consultant? How about: “Aggressive Driving? Aggressive Enforcement.” Or “Not enough space? We’ll get in your face.”
America, ya gotta love it.