1365 High Time

If you’re interested in extending your life, Albert Einstein may be able to help.
Physicists have long known that one of the peculiar aspects of Einstein’s General Theory of Relativity—that time changes with the position of the observer—is true. For example, the perception of time nearly stops for an observer on a rocket ship going the speed of light, relative to an outside observer
Or if you’re in a black hole, or the bottom of a mine or something. Boy does time seem to drag then.
Here on earth, or not too far above it, the same thing happens. Time ticks slightly slower on a fast-moving satellite than a stationary one.
Great if you happen to be living on a satellite. But recently, using ultra-sensitive atomic clocks, scientists have determined that clocks run slower and faster on a smaller scale too. A clock put just one foot above the floor ticks slower than one actually on the floor. And a clock put in a car going just 20 mph ticks ever so slightly slower than a non-moving clock.
Hey hey. That means living in the city makes you live longer. Assuming traffic is moving relatively quickly. Another reason for good transportation planning. Slower moving traffic, not to mention gridlock, is now scientifically proven to shorten your lifespan.
Add that to where you live. If you live on the top floor of a skyscraper, you’ll live longer than the folks on the ground floor. That’s right. Over a lifetime, people who live on top age 100-millionths of a second more slowly than folks on the bottom.
There you have it. Science tells us indisputably that it’s high time we embraced high living.
Hey, every 100-millionth of a second counts...
America, ya gotta love it.