1240 Dumb Doin’s

Ever find yourself doin’ dumb things? I do. And when I catch myself I really wonder about that level of consciousness that we often go through that is barely functional. The drone state of mind when we coast through the day, not totally aware, but still doin’ routine things.
I call it not unconscious, but dumbconscious.
Like the other morning as I finished my shower and was preparing for work, I reached into my bathroom drawer, pulled out a tube of toothpaste, uncapped it, and proceeded to almost smear it on my underarm.
I’m not making this up. Many of the motions are the same, my dumbconscious got my routine out of order, and voila, no armpit cavities.
Or that night when I woke up and it was pitch black from a power outage. The first thing I did was grope for my glasses. And how much better will they help me see in the dark?
My favorite act of dumbconscious is when you’re going down the stairs, and you think the next step is a stair, but you’ve cleared the stairway and it’s actually your second step on flat ground. Your leg still acts as if it’s a stair and your whole body shudders because there’s no down to go to.
And then there’s when I went through a pretty bad period in my life. Yes, even comedians get suicidal. I was having particularly black thoughts one day, and I got into my car to drive somewhere, and I fastened the seat belt.
I had an epiphany. If I really wanted to kill myself, why bother to fasten the seatbelt?
It cheered me up. I guess my dumbconscious was telling me things weren’t that bad.
It ain’t that dumb after all...
America, ya gotta love it.