When it comes time to learn what
the next big investment is, look no further than your local zoo. That is if
your zoo has a panda. That's right, a panda, the gigantic version of the little
teddy bears we had as kids.
It's an animal that's guaranteed to
bring folks in. Folks who want to ooh and aah. Folks who melt and gush, and
fret over whether or not they'll be able to get a panda couple to conceive and
have an adorable teddy-baby. Folks who will pay top dollar for a ticket.
And the Chinese are making a bundle
off them. Pandanomics, as some folks call it, is one of the great leveraged
investment tools of China. There are currently about 50 of the colossal
black-and-white furballs on loan to zoos around the world. Almost all have been
arranged only after major trade and investment deals.
In 2011, for example, Scotland
entered into a multi-billion dollar deal with China where they traded
oil-drilling technology and salmon for a pair of pandas. Scots were barely able
to contain their enthusiasm.
In 2006, Australia agreed to supply
uranium to China in exchange for pandas.
Canada and France have done the same thing with their uranium exports.
How nice, giving China the means to
manufacture nuclear weapons in exchange for a couple of cute titanic teddy
bears. What could go wrong? And it's bad enough we're trading bomb making
materials for bamboo-eating beasts. We're not even buying them. They're just on
loan! Somehow that makes our fawning prostitution of the means to our national
security even worse. All to sell tickets at zoos…
Is this what they call pandering?
Or is it just the bad investment
strategy you normally see in a bear market?
America, ya gotta love it.
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