1628 Chopsticks and Porsches

If someone had asked me, "Funny Guy, do you think it's ever possible that you may be able to work Porsches and chopsticks into the same essay?" I probably wouldn't have been able to answer in the affirmative.
Unless I constructed some James Bond-like commentary in which a Dr. No-like figure entertained James over a meal of shark sushi while a auto-piloted fast car tried to get to him through a torturously curving escape tunnel in a volcano.
Then again, it probably would have been an Aston Martin.
Let's see if I can do so anyhow. Recent research found that Greece's economic woes are weirder than thought. This is the country dragging down the euro and threatening to topple the economy. Turns out there are more Porsche Cayennes in Greece than taxpayers reporting more than $68,000 a year.
Sounds pretty bad. But it could be the Aristotle Onassis/Blofield type rich Greek shipping tycoons own a whole fleet of Porsches apiece. It is ironic that the country loudest in their condemnation of bad Greek debt and calling for the most austerity is Germany. The country that benefited most from selling these apparently financed Porsches. Like bad mortgage getters in the US, someone should have told them no. Maybe a doctor.
Instead, all investors got were bonds, bad bonds.
On to chopsticks. We in the US are often criticized for cutting down trees to make toilet paper. The Chinese kill trees for a different end. 3.8 million trees to be exact. They do so to make disposable chopsticks. 57 billion pairs. A lot of which go to the US. So your last enlightened trip to the tofu place contributed to an environmental travesty, possible global warming, and the end of the world.
From China with love.
Shark sushi anyone?
America, ya gotta love it.