1439 iZip

Here’s an interesting factoid. A recent study showed that nearly one in five children, aged two to five, can operate a smartphone application. The actual figure is 19 percent. That’s according to a survey done by security software developer AVG.
Why smartphones and children are security issues was not addressed. Perhaps 3-year-old hackers are becoming a problem in the daycare world. Programming the snack dispenser to spit out more pudding cups. Filching the playground monitor’s iPhone and resetting her playground timer for longer swing time.
But what was interesting about the statistic was another one published nearly simultaneously. One in five kids can use a smartphone; only one in ten can tie their own shoelaces.
Looks to me like Steve Jobs has a new area for explosive technological development. I-Shoes.
Yeah. They tie themselves when you make rapid finger motions along the tongues or soles. Piezoelectric tendrils wrap themselves in convoluted configurations. One virtual tug and, voila, tied shoelaces.
The technology could be expanded to other nettlesome clothing items. Knotting a necktie for instance. Some adults never master that. A couple of finger strokes in your chest area and bingo, knotted necktie.
If Jobs is smart, he’ll make the motions similar to scratching chest hairs. Then your average Barcolounger-bred Neanderthal will be ready for the boardroom with a couple of natural motions.
Or hey, what about an XYZ app? A smartphone-bluetooth camera knockoff that automatically examines your zipper. No more embarrassing barn door openings. The XYZ Fly-to-the-Rescue app closes it for you.
Just be sure to keep the area clear of anything pinchable.
Now that’s something that would be a good thing for security expert AVG to handle. Imagine the potential for malware for a malfunctioning ill-timed automatic zipper.
Ouch.
America, ya gotta love it.